Introduction: In marriage, there are things that will come up from time to time that will break down the unity of marriage. Often times, these things will start off small and then become bigger and badder. Little things unattended will lead to bigger things and can eventually lead to a failed marriage. It’s always good to see some things that can start off small, and become bigger, so that they may be addressed and corrected immediately. Ephesians 4:26-27 “Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: Neither give place to the devil”.
(Termites destroy more property than do earthquakes. More fires are cause by matches and cigarettes than by volcanoes. More heartaches and sorrow are caused by little words and deeds of unkindness than by open acts of dislike and enmity).
I. Parents or In-Laws– Parents and In-laws can be a big help or a major problem. Genesis 2:24 “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh”. Also found in Mark 10:7 and Ephesians 5:31. We are commanded to “leave his father and his mother”.
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- Comments, suggestions, criticism, judgment, from parents or In-laws can affect the marriage.
- Ways in which parents or In-Laws work their way into- parenting, career, finances, or any other major decisions.
- The new couple can live far away and have not “left mother and father” or they can live next door to their parents or in-laws and “have left”.
- Before getting married, we are to obey, honor, receive counsel, and please our parents. But after “leaving and cleaving” to our spouses, we are to obey, honor, receive counsel and please our spouses.
- Genesis 31:14-15
II. Discouragement– A person gets discouraged when things are not going the way they should, when there is defeat, failure, or a heavy burden. Discouragement will happen to all of us at any given time however, it should not be left unattended. What are the solutions to discouragement?
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- Rest- Mark 6:30-31 “Come ye yourselves apart into a desert place, and rest a while”.
- Cast Your Burdens to the Lord- Psalm 55:22 “Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and he shall sustain thee: he shall never suffer the righteous to be moved”.
- Encourage yourself in the Lord- I Samuel 30:6
- Encourage Others- Deuteronomy 3:28 “But charge Joshua, and encourage him, and strengthen him”
- The best encourager should be the one by our side, our spouses.
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III. Unthankfulness– A person should always be thankful with another, this should include their spouses. When a husband or wife does something special for the other, they should be thankful to one another.
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- We are usually unthankful because we take the special thing for granted or we expect the special thing therefore we are not thankful.
- I Thessalonians 5:18 “In everything give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you”.
- Don’t be like the world which is unthankful II Timothy 3:2. Romans 1:21, be thankful for the little things and big things your spouse does for you and your family.
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IV. TV and Internet- Too much television, internet or any hobby, will cause other things to get neglected.
- A person will ignore their spouse or kids, chores, and any spiritual or physical matters that need attention.
- Spouses can literally be in the same room watching TV, spending “quality time” and not talk to each other. That is not quality time, there is no communication going on.
- The internet- It goes from doing something productive to spending idle time you won’t get back.
- II Corinthians 2:11 “Lest Satan should get an advantage of us: for we are not ignorant of his devices”.
Conclusion: Little things will cause disunity. The unity of marriage must always be on the forefront of our marriages. If we see that there is disunity, we need to identify the problem, work on the problem, and get rid of the problem. These are just a few of the little thing that we should be aware of in our marriages because, they can affect our marriages if left unattended.